Back in February, I went back to England to visit my Dad. I have an old unused Blackberry, so I thought I would just take it with me, buy a SIM Card, on account of the last trip and the extortionately large bill I received when I got back to Vashon for using my US phone for 1 call.
Simple idea, but as it turns out, it was a nightmare to arrange. I ended up buying a new cheap phone in England, and apart from the problems setting it up through T-Mobile a carrier who shall remain anonymous. I mean, their input template wouldn’t recognize a period FFS. Have you ever tried to type in an e-mail address without being able to use the “.” function? I ended up opening a word document, typing in .com, and pasting it in to the required field. Several sweary words later, I managed to open an account and make a call.
When I got home, I decided to give the phone to my 9 year old son, who is getting more independant by the day. I thought, mistakenly as it turns out, that if I bought a US SIM Card, it would work just fine. $10 later, I installed the new SIM Card, only to get this error message, “Not Compatible.”
What is not compatible?
The phone, the card, me and my wife, or some other piece of nonsense?
It didn’t say.
By now, the normally sedate Legend’s blood pressure was causing my eyes to bulge as I headed off Island to find a card that would work. I popped into Target and was helped by a nice young man who wanted to be my best friend, and couldn’t do enough for me. He promised that if the T-Mobile card didn’t work, he would refund the money (another $10), an option I partook of the very next day because it was the wrong f***ing size.
By now, my heart was keeping time to a Gloria Estefan Conga as I headed towards a T-Mobile store, fully intent on doing someone bodily harm if this was not resolved.
The salesperson took the phone, opened it up, inserted the right size of SIM Card, opened the account and handed it back to me and said, “This should work now.” I paid another $10 for the new card, and a $10 top up for service.
I switched it on and got a “No Service” message.
“It appears to be NOT working now,” I said with only a slight hint of malice.
“Oh, did you say you bought it in England?”
“Oh, It is probably locked for use in England and won’t work in the USA.”
I grabbed him by the throat and flung him to the floor and started to beat him senseless with my English f***ing useless phone. Actually, I didn’t do that, but I SO wanted to. Instead,I asked him politely why he sold me the new card and accepted my money if he KNEW it was not going to work.
I think there may have been a few expletives in there also, on account of the manager coming over to intervene.
He apologised, and then offered to sell me a phone that would work which would cost another $49.99.
I offered to insert it up his rectum.
I left the store in a mood that, let’s say, could only be described as uncharitable, and went to search for a new phone. This was my last chance to avoid a hefty jail sentence as a result of strangling someone, so I headed off to the Seattle Mall.
I did find one, and paid the more reasonable $29.99.
I now have to charge it up. Of course, the charger doesn’t fit any of the other devices we have, so I have to buy something that will work in the car too.
Sometimes good ideas just don’t work that well.